Note: This is a
new column by K. Danielle Edwards. The previous column by her was
tltled "From the Fringe". We anticipate it will appear
the train wreck that is season two of Bravo’s The Real Housewives
of Atlanta is really starting to rub me the wrong way. Yes, the
antics and absolute scripted dramas got me going for a hot second,
not unlike the scandals and micro-dramas of other reality TV shows
(typically in the vein of Project Runway, for example).
we must consider this: most of these “housewives” are
not married. The last time I checked, a wife was a woman physically,
spiritually, financially and legally joined to a man who has formally
committed himself to her for the rest of his days. This is usually
done before a body of witnesses and typically entails a ceremony.
said, they may be lying up in the house, but they aren’t anyone’s
The Real Housewives of Atlanta, Kandi Burruss, the singer of Xscape
fame, is unmarried. Sheree Whitfield, whose only “success”
came via the NFLer whom she recently divorced, is unmarried. And
Kim Zolciak, the token white woman on the show, is linked to a sugar
daddy mysteriously called “Big Poppa.”
Leakes is married to a brother-man a number of years her senior.
And Lisa Wu Hartwell is married to an injured NFL player who hasn’t
played for a few seasons.
show reminds me of real life in many ways, no matter how far removed
it is from any realm of reality known to most of us. For example,
these days, baby mommas are conflated with common-law wives. Moreover,
people who are engaged for umpteen years become placebos for the
real thing. They call each other husband and wife playfully, like
it’s cute. Then someone dies, someone leaves or otherwise
exercises the options unavailable to married folks, and they cry
fact, tattered and fractured relationships have so become the norm,
that we have placed conventional labels on these incredibly conditional
all, like the rapper Common said, many black women can say that
they’re mothers, but most can’t say that they’re
loose legs, broken promises and unrequited obligations were really
okay, would so many try to find a marital equivalent to describe
MARRIED MOMMA are musings fromBlackCommentator.com
Columnist K. Danielle Edwards - a Black full-time
working mother and wife, with a penchant for prose, a heart for
poetry, a love of books and culture, a liking of fashion and style,
a knack for news and an obsession with facts - beating the odds,
defying the statistics. Sister
Edwards is a Nashville-based writer, poet and communications professional,
seeking to make the world a better place, one decision and one action
at a time. To her, parenting is a protest against the odds, and
marriage is a living mantra for forward movement. Her work has appeared
MARRIED MOMMA, MotherVerse Literary Journal, ParentingExpress, Mamazine, The Black World Today, Africana.com, The Tennessean
and other publications.She is the author of Stacey Jones: Memoirs of Girl & Woman, Body & Spirit,
Life & Death(2005) and is the founder and creative director of
The Pen: An Exercise in
the Cathartic Potential of the Creative Act, a nonprofit creative
writing project designed for incarcerated and disadvantaged populations.Click
here to contact Ms. Edwards.
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