I was sipping a white chocolate mocha outside Starbuck’s when my friend Susan walked up.  She was wearing a purple jogging suit and high heels – she’s from L.A. – and her cheeks were an angry red.  Throwing a copy of the Daily Breeze onto my table, she growled, “I hate this guy!”

I looked at the headlines.  “Nader Calls Democrats Whiners.”

“Well, if you think about it,” I began gingerly, “the Democrats should be thanking Nader.  They’ve adopted all their new ideas from the Green Party.”

Susan’s eyebrows cursed at me. “Such as?”

“Let’s begin with the war in Iraq.  At the start, the Democrats supported it.  Now they’re all saying they’re against it.  The Greens opposed the war before a single U.S. soldier was shot.”

I took a sip.  “Or take health care.  Hillary was pilloried for advocating universal health insurance – which even poor countries have – but the Democrats retreated in the face of Republican [I almost said “Iraqi”] resistance.  Now almost every Democrat supports the idea; but this is a cornerstone of Green policy.”

I looked at another headline: “Once Supporters, Democrats Now Question PATRIOT Act.”

“As a Green,” I began, “I don’t want the government torturing teenagers, snooping on synagogues or reading my email.”  I thought of my grandson’s “John Ashcroft” Halloween costume, and I shuddered.

“Dems: Free Trade Not Fair,” read another headline.  “Wasn’t NAFTA – the North America Foul Trade Agreement – Al Gore’s love child?  Thanks to him, America has lost millions of jobs to countries that don’t have unions, a minimum wage, or child labor laws.”  Inside, the espresso machine made a giant sucking sound.

I looked at another headline: “Dems in Campaign Financing Dilemma.” “Campaigns should be financed by the people.  Let’s toss corporations and fat cats – like media Stalin Rupert Murdoch – out of our electoral system.  In fact, in my campaign for Lieutenant Governor, I didn’t take any corporate contributions over $10,000,000.”  I grinned.

“And,” I added, “while everybody’s now talking about Enron, the Green Party warned long ago that corporations had too much power, that they ought to pay their fair share in taxes.  A Green policy would have saved California billions during the blackouts – and that’s not just 20/20 hindsight.  Check out our policies at www.gp-us.org.”

“What do you think about the Confederate flag flap?” Susan asked me, looking at another headline.

“Some Greens like the Confederate flag, especially in the more backward parts of the country, such as Tennessee or Santa Monica.”  I smiled.  “But the Green Party platform is clear: the flag should be banned from public buildings, just like the swastika.”

“What about local issues?” Susan enquired, finally sitting down.  “My son’s college tuition just increased by 15%!”

“I love the UCLA Bruins,” I said, “but community colleges educate three quarters of all students in California.  They pump $3 billion into California’s economy each year.  We want to keep tuition down to $11 per unit – but, ultimately, college should be free.”

“Did you support the recall?” asked Susan, cocking her head.

“Sure did,” I said, “and I support the recall of Governor Schwarzenegger too.”

“I still wish Gore had won the election, though,” Susan said plaintively.

“Me too,” I agreed.  Susan looked askance at me.  “The Greens question the Electoral College; the Greens want it to be easier, not harder, for people to vote.  Election Day should be a holiday.  These are ideas that Hillary Clinton and Jimmy Carter have only recently cottoned on to.

“Don’t get me wrong, the Green Party’s not perfect,” I concluded, “but we did what we set out to do in 2000: not win the election, but move the Democratic Party back to the left.”

A bus drove by, coughing up acrid smoke.  Susan breathed in deeply after it had passed.   “I guess sooner or later we’ll all be Green,” she sighed.

Donna Jo Warren is the Green Party’s former candidate for Lieutenant Governor of California (donnawarren.com).  Reach her at [email protected].  Dr. Jonathan David Farley is a former Fulbright Distinguished Scholar to the United Kingdom and a counter-terrorism consultant.

December4, 2003
Issue 67

is published every Thursday.